a notable exception - a wildfire

this weekend was to be nothing but relaxation and revival
well there was definitely a lot of that
with one notable exception
a wildfire

one whose flames licked at the edges of our quiet cul-de-sac
threatening our families' homes
and
i was not there
i was not there to witness it
but oh the images in my mind were vivid enough
i was not there to help
i was not there to comfort
i was not there

it was the end of the first day of a fabulous workshop {that i will be posting about soon}
my thoughts were on heading toward the beach and maybe catching a movie
the first call was made to me by mike in a rather casual voice
'there's a fire on the hill'
i wasn't quite entertained by his idea of going to video it

what followed was nothing short of the scene in a movie in which you find yourself yelling at the screen telling the girl what to do, because she's incapable of making any decisions on her own

phone calls and texts from family, dear friends, and neighbors
telling us they could see the fire
asking if we were ok
offering help
showing up at my house to race my children to safety
and
asking me forcefully what they should throw into my van
what should they save...?
what items would i want to preserve if our entire house went up in flames?
i could hear the urgency in their voices, the chaos behind them

i was absolutely paralyzed, completely incapable of thinking on my own
{begin screen screaming...}
the only things i could think of were my computer, my hard drives, and my photos
thankfully i knew where all those were
but could my lips articulate how to find them in my house?
not without much stuttering, repetition of ineffectual words like 'um' and 'uh', and flailing of my arms

what else, they asked
i could not think, my body was shaking, my teeth were chattering, it was too much
to my rescue came two girls, two strangers, guardian angels really, that i had met that day at the workshop
they stayed by my side, thinking for me, and yelling out ideas
journals
important documents
blessing and wedding dresses
wedding album

i could not believe this was happening
i needed to be home, but i was too far away, there was nothing i could do in time
i wondered why i was here
i had felt such a divine thread in me coming to the workshop that i had a hard time understanding why Heavenly Father would want me to be here when my home was yards away from becoming ash
mike continued to reassure me that everything was going to fine, not to come home, there was no need.
he began telling me a silly story about the kids responding to mike's request for them to grab what was important and leave, by grabbing their gatorades and treats they had just bought at the store.  i have to admit that i was annoyed at first that he would 'waste' precious time by telling me about my children's juvenile thoughts on what defined 'important', but as i began to laugh an amazing thing happened:
i began to calm down
mike's humor had disengaged my frantic behavior and i began to feel capable of handling this
i later thanked my Heavenly Father for blessing me with a man who is just perfect for me
a man that knows exactly what i need and what i needed at that moment

i got off the phone reassured that if those remaining at the workshop would offer a prayer on our behalf, that i could make it home alone
{as the girls had offered to drive me}
april offered a heartfelt prayer on behalf of my family and i felt the peace i needed and the lessening of the wobbling of my legs
it is a beautiful thing what prayer can do to unite near strangers

i received updates from mike and my mom and leslie as i drove home
the peace remained with me
and 15 minutes before i arrived home, the fire was contained and had not reached closer than 50 yards to our home, 50 yards is way too close for my comfort but i'll take it

as i pulled up to the house and saw the charred hill i was overcome with emotion and my legs began to give out, my body began to shake, and my teeth began to chatter once again
i opened my front door to the solid smell of fire hitting me in the face
and to two of my boys running down the stairs calling out to me and engulfing me in hugs,
oh i needed that
oh how grateful i was for those who came to our aid
oh how grateful for that front door and for those gripping arms of my children
mike was calm as if nothing had happened
the yin to my yang

several times i went outside before bed to see flashlights of those heroic firemen casing the hill for hotspots and doing whatever firemen do that i am so grateful for
i went to sleep listening to their saws and knowing they were keeping watch
those who know me, know that i do not cook, bake, wok, etc and i have never wanted to bake cookies before, ever, but those firemen need some cookies to say the least

in the morning i walked down the stairs and noticed the ash on the floor for the first time

i strolled around my cul-de-sac and surveyed the damage
oh how close it came
it was a sobering sight
even the animals felt it
i heard coyotes howling, birds screeching, and saw lots of displaced wildlife at the edge of our street

although both mike and my mom were insistent that i return to my workshop that day,
i found myself wanting to wait until all my children had awoken so that i could hold them a little before i left
i lingered and got ready at a leisurely pace
i had been emotionally and physically affected by being separated from them during such a traumatic event
however, i was grateful that i was able to return to the workshop and found the art to be quite therapeutic
i can't wait to share what i have experienced

one thing that i have learned from this particular experience is that i need to be better prepared for an emergency
friends, what would you save from your home? please share.  i would love to hear.
do you have a list of those items and where they are located?
is your list somewhere others could get at if you were not there?
do you have friends and neighbors to call on that would race to your side?
my challenge to myself and to you is to compile this information
for 'if ye are prepared ye shall not fear'  {Doctrine and Covenants 38:30}

Even in the little things--- a creative escape made possible

i am packing my bag
and getting ready to go...
alone
i am off for a much needed two day creativity boost
i will be attending the Prospector Artisan Workshops

participating in 4 incredible classes

silversmithing

screen printing

pop art 

letter press

4 things i would LOVE to learn, and arts that aren't just the run of the mill crafts, 

these are unique and fabulous

i know... pinch me, its really happening

my attendance came about in a most divine and unexpected way
it is due to the kindness of 3 women {Janine, Katy, and April} and my willing husband that i will be there

it has been a reaffirmation that God loves me, He knows me, and He provides tender mercies along life's journey
if you read my recent post 'in pieces', you may agree that some creative 'me' time will be a blessed boost to my spirits
that's not to say that i don't feel a wee bit guilty for leaving my 4 children in the hands of my amazing husband for two days
but i cannot deny God's hand in how this all came about
He knows me, Briana, His daughter
and loves me enough to inspire women to give and write on my behalf
so that i could give this creative spirit a renewal of sorts
through such a small means as this
He cares about all the little things in our life that much
why?
because they matter to us

"Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee"

Jeremiah 1:5

"God does notice us, and he watches over us.  But it is usually through another person that he meets our needs."

Pres. Spencer W. Kimball

i am so grateful for how this has all transpired
and plan on enjoying every moment of it
can't wait to share what i've learned when i return

'Gateway to Summer' door banner diy tutorial

summer is approaching once again...
i for one, am not quite ready
but that doesn't mean that i'm not going to welcome it when it arrives.
last year we marked the beginning of summer in just the right fashion
with celebration through color and energy
you might recall these images of elated faces and blurry bodies
darting past checkered flags and through multi-colored ribbons
ringing in the days of sprinkler and pool fun

as i was finally unpacking a few more boxes from the garage
i came across the letters S U M M E R from last year's door banner
Owen also saw them and became animated in explaining to me the manner in which he would be running through them this year
so it was official
i needed to create a new one

as i received so much great feedback from last year
i decided to create a diy tutorial for you to make your own
'GATEWAY TO SUMMER' door banner

supplies:

a rainbow of colors of ribbon - i used floral acetate ribbon for outside durability

oilcloth - 12 x 12 cardstock paper would probably work too

jute or other twine

popsicle sticks

tape - i used masking

2 nails

lets get going:

ribbons

measure your doorway - width and length
clear a large portion of the floor to work on

cut a generous amount of jute for the top of the banner using your width measurement as a guide

measure any color ribbon the length of your doorway {i started with red},

don't cut it...tie the ribbon in a knot around one end of your jute piece

and then finish off the piece of ribbon by cutting it once it measures the length of the doorway again

voila your first section of ribbon!

repeat this 'measure...knot...measure...cut' pattern so that you have a total of 3 knotted ribbons for each color {a total of 6 ribbon strands per color}

wherever you want the letters to fit in on your banner, leave an opening approx 12" wide

do this without kiddies running around or it may become a tangled ribbon mess:)

letters

cut the letters S U M M E R out of oilcloth or cardstock

mine are the height of 11"

i free-handed my letters but you could use a bold font like this to create templates

cut two generous pieces of jute the length of the doorway

lay out all your letters upside on the floor inside the opening between the ribbons you designated for them

i gave myself about a foot between the top and where i wanted my letters to start

tie your two pieces of 'length' jute to the top 'width' jute piece approx 8" apart

lay them down the sides of all the letters, stapling in numerous places in a X pattern

i taped popsicle sticks onto the backs of the portions of the letters that were not attached to the jute and may become floppy when hung

hanging

get your trusty ladder and recruit a helper if possible

{i managed to do this on my own, but it was just short of a trip to the Urgent Care:)}

hammer a nail into each side of the top of your doorway

tie each end of your banner to the nail and

voila!

your kids' own 

GaTEwAy to SuMmER

now throw in some signs of congratulations in the yard,

some checkered flags with crete paper marking the finish line

and you've got yourself the perfect way to say goodbye to school and hello to summer.

to my mother

happy mother's day to the woman who shaped my life
as i wonder if any of the little, ordinary things that i do as a mother each and every day carry weight or make a difference,
i think about how i feel towards you and what you have done for me
remembering that the relationship that you and i have
is what i pray my relationship with each of my children will become
yes, oh yes mom little things do matter.

for those times you
made me rad culottes and button down jumpers
detangled the rats nest that was my long hair every morning while i cried
took me to piano lessons and waited
stayed up late helping me build a castle and other school projects
made and saran wrapped my dinner to enjoy after late practices and meetings
took me school shopping 45 minutes away to the nearest major store
choreographed my drill team routine
wrote me encouraging notes and letters
stayed up until i got home from my dates and dances
mothered my friends who weren't as lucky as i
taught me that i can do hard things
danced with Daddy in the living room
encouraged me to pray and listen for answers

for all these things and a million more
i love you mom
you are what i want to be when i grow up

In pieces

Felicity broke my vintage double strand pearl necklace a few days ago
one that made me feel like audrey hepburn whenever i wore it
a classically beautiful piece of jewelry that i could see myself wearing until all my skin was wrinkly and my hair was pristine white

i have been finding pearls here and there around the house
in Felicity's purse
under my bed
in her hand
on the tile

this morning as i found a new collection of lost pearls
i felt as if my necklace's demise were a microcosm to how i am feeling about my life today
a beautifully strung strand of pearls of varying diameters stretched and scattered
things that were once in line have slipped away from my reach
some seem lost forever
a healthy husband
a healthy father
employment for our family {that uninvited guest just keeps refusing to leave}

these were some of the central pearls, great in diameter
with their disappearance
also left pieces of
patience
perspective
understanding
selflessness

how i pray that i may find all of these pieces again

i hold in my hand the central pearl, the pearl with the greatest weight
faith
i am gripping it tightly, holding onto it, feeling of its smooth mass in my hand

i know that my necklace will never look the same again
but i pray that the new necklace that the Master is creating will be more beautiful than the first
and that i will see it as so
even with all its chips and stains
that my
patience
perspective
understanding
selflessness
will grow in weight and size

that only His hands can put my pieces back together
that i must be diligent in seeking for them
and then lay them at his feet
for He can create something far more beautiful than i can imagine
and then when i wear it, i will feel not just like a movie star, but a queen

Join Team MJ vs MS this Saturday for a MS Walk

Why am I walking you ask?
For the man that I love.
For the man who exibits daily unyielding strength  - strength of faith, strength of hope, strength of joy admist hardship, and strength to give each day his all no matter what he physically feels like inside.
For the father of my children
For the mate to my soul
For him I walk
Please join with me in showing him the impact his strength has made on you!

My sister Vanessa and brother-in-law Josh have graciously created Team 'MJ vs MS' for this coming Saturday April 28th MS Walk at NTC Park in San Diego to show their love and support for Mike.

It is a 3 mile walk to support the research and education of Multiple Sclerosis.

I invite you to come join us as a participant on our team and show Mike the impact he has made on your life.
If you are unable to participate perhaps consider sponsoring our team monetarily as a virtual walker;).
Together we can bring awareness and solutions for this crippling disease.

If you are interested, please visit my Team Page and register or donate here.

Then please comment or email me to let me know that you will be joining us on the walk and I can give you further details about t-shirts, caravanning, and the potluck lunch back at our home which will help Mike feel apart of our support and effort.

Thank you dear friends for you support as we have journeyed with MS together.

To read more about our family's journey with MS click here or on the label in the sidebar.

Come conquer buttonholes

intimidated by buttonholes?
i know, i know, my stomach gets all knotty too
but nows your chance to stare them in the face and conquer
as well as come away with a refashioned cardigan made from that unworn shirt from the back of your closet that you just can't throw away

Come to my sewing class
Buttonholes via Refashioned Cardigan
Wednesday May 9th from 7:30 to 9:30 pm
at my home

we will be beginning with Easily Dunn's rightfully named tutorial:
diy: make an awesome cardigan from a shirt from the 6th grade that you never wear but refuse to throw away

and then adding an actual buttonhole to make it functional

{above photos by Easily Dunn}

visit my sewing blog for all the details!
our additional May class will be announced on the blog soon.
see you in a couple of weeks - you and your neglected shirt

Ode to the little tikes slide

O little tikes slide, O little tikes slide
how you will be missed
your triangular form of up and down have supported the weight of four happy growing children
until that last climb was just one too many

you have been a rocket ship
an ice cream stand
a clubhouse
a jet ski
a bridge over hot lava
a pirate ship barricade
a ski slope
a puppet theater
just to name a few

your angular goodness the source of many 'whee's and 'woo-hoo's
{and occasionally 'boo-hoo's but we'll forgive those due to your demise}
your bright red and blue a reminder of childhood carefree at its best
the rush of that downward gravity on your 3 foot drop

you have moved with us from desert to mountain and back again
many a eight times
as i see you in that recycling bin
a part of my children's childhood goes with you

may you be recycled into my next market bag
so that our paths will cross again

what to do about cave drawings and spills and tears

i often wish i could change my personality to be someone more patient, more carefree, less uptight about certain things, less barky

or maybe its not that i need to change my personality per se but that i need to continue to develop the characteristics that are inside me, just oftentimes dominated by my weaknesses

this is where i find myself

at a crossroads

between the mother that i am at my best and the mother i am at my worst

i am so very grateful to the many comments that i received here on my blog, on FB, and even through text  regarding my post on my trivial fabric dilemma

many of them from mothers i aspire to be more like

oh how i want to be that mother who reacts the calm, gentle, and carefree way when strawberry jelly is knocked over onto her fabric covered dining chairs 

the unplasticized, white and bold colored patterned fabric calling out to her that it was her decision to unplasticize and recover them with fabric with large amounts of white

because she didn't like the feel of sticky vinyl or its grandma implications

and she didn't want to depart from her inclination toward airy graphic fabric 

that is the mother i would choose to be

the one who gets to choose the style she wants to live in and also is patient when it is scarred by little hands

i found it very ironic that soon after writing my post and receiving varying suggestions, 

that I found this cave chair drawing

accompanied the following day by this torn pillow cover

immediately following the discovery of the chair drawing began a session of our church's semiannual General Conference

a source of great peace and inspiration to me

a weekend i look forward to with great anticipation every six months

one of the talks was given by our beloved prophet Thomas S Monson

he related a brief story of a woman who spent her time furnishing and cleaning her home, and did not invite her grandchildren over for fear they would break or ruin her precious possessions.  she later received a diagnosis of a life-threatening disease and immediately knew that she wanted to spend her remaining time with her family and friends, those who were truly most precious to her.

Such moments of clarity come to all of us at one time or another, although not always through so dramatic a circumstance.  We see clearly what it is that really matters in our lives and how we should be living.

Pres. Thomas S. Monson, "The Race of Life"

if i choose a dark fabric to hide the stains and decide on covering the cushions in vinyl

that is definitely not a guarantee that somehow, some way, strawberry jelly will not make its way onto them.

yes, the decision of which fabric to purchase is trivial

but the ever so untrivial and important decision is how i will react when chair drawings, tears, and spills occur

will i be quick to bark and demonstrate that those most precious to me are possessions rather than posterity

seeing my sorrowful little boy's face quickly hidden in his hands softened and opened my heart

this image reminded me of the crinkly paper on my fridge that houses some of my favorite quotes

i may have shared this before

but if so, its a good one that needs to remembered again and again

...hence the posting on my fridge

When we act with the child's needs in mind, we act very differently.  When we understand that our children are doing the best they know how in a big, confusing world in which they often feel awkward and powerless, we like Jesus, can act redemptively.  When a child falls short because of lack of wisdom or experience, we can teach rather than punish.

H. Wallace Goddard, "The Soft-Spoken Parent" 

whatever i decide about my silly chairs, i decided and not my children
i must remember that spills are going to happen
{and truthfully often they are from me}
and though the scrubbing and repairing will be inconveniences, i must not make my children feel as if they are
oh dear friends, remind me of this!

Trivial fabric dilemma: chime in please

in attempts to avoid delving into thoughts of the heavy things happening in my life right now,
i have decided to escape to the trivial
and bring you there with me
because i would love your input on this trivial matter

once upon a time i had a dining table....with 6 actual dining chairs
we had acquired them from Mike's long time bachelor brother-in-law turned new husband
i painted the honey oak black and covered the textured striped velour with a red and cream toile
they served us well for several years
long story short, i sold them before we moved out of state on the tantalizing promise from Mike that we would be able buy a new set shortly after settling in.
needless to say it has been 6 years and 7 moves later with very little settling in
however Mike did follow through with the better half of his promise,
we were able to buy the most beautiful pedestal table from ZGallerie similar to this one

in my eyes a timelessly styled table
it has been the material pride and joy of my home{s}
really the only reflection of my style in some of the places we have lived

as we do not buy anything on credit
{something we learned early in our marriage}
we could not afford the chairs that came with the Manchester dining table
in lieu of beautifully crafted dining chairs
we
bought
4 black Target folding chairs
our family was littler then
so only 4,
i never imagined that 6 years later we would be eating off of them as well as in addition to a random white one we have since acquired
which in their defense have served us most diligently these many years
yes we still eat on non-matching folding chairs surrounding my still beautiful, though dented and scratched, dining table

a while back i acquired several chairs of my grandmother's, a combination from 2 different dining sets
i can close my eyes and visualize their original mountain high home

neither of these chairs are my style at all, but i am hoping that some paint and new fabric will make them at home in the family for another generation

here is the trivial decision i am hoping to receive your feedback on

i am deciding on fabrics for the seat cushions 

and all i seem to be drawn to are patterns which involve white, some in large amounts

fabric: top to bottom, left to right:

urban zoology, nuances, zippy, washi tape,

  fruit slice, true turquoise, canopy, cottage

thoughts of smashed blueberries, spilt green smoothies, and sticky strawberry jam

hadn't even entered my head when thinking of choosing a fabric

then all at once it dawned on me...

my children will be using and abusing these chairs

with black folding chairs, those stains have never shown up or have wiped off easy enough

so do i dare select one of these fabulously airy graphic fabrics

and coat them in layers of scotchguard

or do i need to steer myself towards another option

like this washi tape fabric in a charcoal

or these light prints of chevron or houndstooth

fabric: left to right: washi tape, zig zag, porcelain tile

all you lucky people who have real dining chairs 

and have children

or are dropsy yourself

please chime in on your take on the fabric dilemma

what has been your experience with food meeting fabric?

what sort of fabric do you have on your chairs?

does scotch guarding them really work?

is a stain a stain no matter if its on white or another color?

and try your hand at being my interior designer

take my poll in the right hand column of which fabric you would choose for my dining chairs

the color scheme for my house you ask?

i decided i'm not choosing between 2 or 3 colors, that is just too difficult when i love color as much as i do

so all that you see is my color scheme

having a blank slate of a house helps too.

like i said, trivial, yet oh so important:)